Here are my top 10 thoughts on living and loving your life.
1. Challenge your status quo and get honest with yourself about what is and isn’t working in your life.
If you are swimming in feelings of anger, resentment, playing a martyr or a victim this is your current CHOICE or perspective. No one has the power to make you feel anything and unless you are willing to take responsibility for how you WANT to feel you.
2. The voice that you need to listen to the most is your own.
That little voice that comes from deep inside your soul KNOWS what you need, and what is best for you. Stop overriding that voice and learn to stay true to who you are and what you need to be happy. If you are truly tired (and that little voice knows) REST… your gut knows when it is time to push through and when it is time to chill out. Trust it.
3. Get uncomfortable.
If things are feeling safe, comfortable and familiar but you still aren’t happy then its time to look at letting go of the ledge. Surround yourself with people and communities that challenge you and reflect the qualities that you want to nurture in yourself and light the fire in your belly. If you want to increase your fitness level but are feeling afraid to workout with people who you perceive to be at a higher level, I encourage you to step into that fear. Remember everyone in any position or circumstance started somewhere. I have never forgotten the saying “If you think you are the smartest person in the room then it is time to switch rooms”. Go where people inspire you to be better, support your dreams and are chasing their own. It can be found in coaches, mentors, friends and communities… if what you are doing and who you are spending your time with isn’t challenging you then it isn’t changing you.
4. Do not measure yourself against anyone else.
Other peoples challenges may not be the same as yours nor do you know their back story. In my own life, my biggest challenge this past year has been slowing down and doing less in order to achieve more. For someone else the challenge may be the exact opposite. If you are looking at someone else’s story to measure your own success you will always be disappointed.
5. Put down the stick and be kind to yourself.
Listen to the dialogue in your head and the language you use with yourself. If you wouldn’t talk to your kids, friends or family in the exact same voice or using the same words then what makes it OK to treat yourself this way? Give yourself permission to make mistakes, be courageous, love yourself and enjoy your power of choice. Try to remember even when you are falling you are still in forward motion. It may feel like you are going backwards but often this is how forward momentum looks. Have faith that you are walking the path you are meant to and that you inner voice (if you choose to listen to it) will always guide you in the right direction.
6. Focus on your wins.
Of all the exercises I give to my clients the victory journal is the one that is met with the most resistance. It seems that most off us are hard wired to look at what we don’t have, what we did wrong, what we didn’t do, what we should be doing etc. If you want to have more victories and feel happy with what you have accomplished then you need to practise putting focus on them! Learn to end your day reflecting on all the amazing things that played out, what you love about yourself and what you accomplished or did that made you feel great. It can be as simple as writing down that you had an extra serving of vegetables or went for a 15 minute walk. Try it for the month of January and let me know what manifests from this simple but life changing exercise.
7. What other people think and feel about you is NONE of your business.
Judgement is all around us so we each have a choice. You can stay small, not play your own game and exhaust yourself trying to make everyone happy OR you can stay true to yourself, chase your own dreams and listen to your own voice. If you are NOT doing something you want or holding yourself back for fear of judgement WHY?? Regardless of what you do or don’t do someone will judge you. Keep your focus on the importance of how you want to feel and perhaps pull back the curtains on some of your own judgements. Bottom line is focus on yourself and never mind the party going on in someone else’s head.
8. Good enough can be good enough.
Perfectionism robs us of our victories and blocks us from having true connection with ourselves and others. Just like any other addiction the more you strive for it the more it becomes out of reach so the harder you try and so on and so on. Trust me when I say the things you obsess about and that you believe just aren’t good enough are amazing when seen through the eyes of someone else. There is a big difference between striving for excellence and pursuing perfection.
9. Don’t stuff, run from or try to hide from you emotions.
There are no good or bad feelings. There are just feelings PERIOD. When we are happy we don’t sit back and question why we are happy or how we can stop being happy. We don’t rationalize why we are happy, but when we are feeling sad, discouraged, angry, resentful, anxious etc. many of us do everything in our power to avoid these feelings. Mood altering comes in many forms such as drugs, alcohol, food, exercise, “getting busy”, shopping, perfectionism and people pleasing to name a few. Stop being afraid to sit in your emotions. In my business more often than not, weight issues have more to do with using food to avoid looking at or feeling what is really going on in life. If you want to be able to experience true joy then you also need to allow yourself to express sorrow and every other emotion. In the words of Brene Brown “If you numb the pain, you also numb the joy”.
10. Be grateful EVERYDAY.
Even on the worst of days there is ALWAYS room for gratitude. Every day I get to walk on this earth, fill my lungs with air and have the freedom to choose how I want to BE is worth expressing gratitude over… and this doesn’t even scratch the surface of all the things I could list in my life that fill it with richness. Regardless of your present circumstances you can always find a hidden gem and a unexpected gift.
May you each experience a rainbow of emotions and LOVE every minute of your life!