Fresh off her second Camino walk, Lisa tackles the question everyone’s thinking but not asking: What’s the actual difference between coaching and therapy? And why do successful, exhausted people often find therapy keeps them stuck while coaching propels them forward?
Here’s the real difference:
Therapy is past-focused—diving into what happened to you, processing trauma, gaining insights about how things impacted you. You talk about the problem, get some insight, then leave.
Coaching is future-focused—where are you now, where do you want to go, and what needs to shift to get you there? It’s about identity shifts, accountability, and taking action.
Lisa’s approach is different because she coaches to your context, not your content. She’s not listening to your circumstances—she’s hearing the patterns underneath your words. Because the problem you think you have? It’s usually not the problem you actually have.
Think about money. Instead of talking about your financial struggles, Lisa asks: “If money were a person, what kind of relationship would you have with them?” Then you step into the identity of someone who treats money with reverence. That’s how she became debt-free—identity shift first, results follow.
You might need therapy if: You’re dealing with clinical depression, trauma, or severe anxiety.
You’re ready for coaching if: You feel stuck despite having it all, keep repeating the same patterns, have done years of therapy but aren’t gaining momentum, or you’re ready to stop being a victim of your circumstances and start taking responsibility for your future.
The bottom line: Coaching isn’t something you need—it’s something you want because you love what it brings to your life and how it helps you expand into more.
Ready to explore what’s possible?
Lisa has openings this summer and fall, plus Reclamation (her signature program) is open for registration.
- To learn about Lisa’s transformative “Reclamation” program, visit LisaCarpenter.ca/Reclamation
- To learn about working 1:1 with Lisa click here
If this episode resonated, share it with someone who might be ready to stop being a victim of their circumstances and start becoming the architect of their life.
TRANSCRIPT
00;00;01;23 - 00;00;27;13
Lisa
Welcome to the Full Frontal Living Podcast. I'm Lisa Carpenter, Master Life Coach, two driven, ambitious humans who want more out of life without having to sacrifice themselves to achieve it. I'll share how it's possible to slow down, take better care of yourself, find more peace and ease, try to sustainable energy, stop procrastination and overwhelm and fall in love with your life, your business, and your body.
00;00;27;16 - 00;00;45;26
Lisa
This podcast is for you. If you're ready to learn what it takes to thrive as a high performer, do less but achieve more. Make you and your well-being a top priority and create your extraordinaire free life. I'm so glad you're here.
00;00;45;29 - 00;01;08;26
Lisa
Well, hey, hey, and welcome to another episode of the Full Frontal Living Podcast. I am recently back from my trip to walk my second Camino. I'm not going to get into that in this episode, but I promise I will give you a debrief episode. But while I was on that trip and I was having dinner with one of the lovely women who was part of our group, she had asked me what I do.
00;01;08;26 - 00;01;28;07
Lisa
And of course, I just, you know, in very simple form said, I'm a coach. She said, okay, well, tell me more about that. And then she asked this really powerful question of what is the difference between coaching and therapy, which made me realize that many of you might be thinking the same thing. Like, what is the difference between coaching a therapy?
00;01;28;07 - 00;01;50;25
Lisa
What would cause me to invest in a coach versus investing in a therapist? So today I wanted to do an episode that's called The Truth about Coaching that nobody talks about, because so many of the women that I work with are have wondered or are in therapy and in coaching or wonder if they should get a coach or a therapist.
00;01;50;27 - 00;02;19;00
Lisa
But what most of my clients are craving isn't to just feel better. They're looking to feel more like themselves, more alive, more aligned, more more freedom, more congruent, so that they feel as good on the inside as their lives. Maybe look on the outside. And today, I really wanted to break down the difference and why successful yet mostly exhausted women and men.
00;02;19;03 - 00;02;44;19
Lisa
Why therapy can actually keep you stuck and why coaching can be the answer to moving you towards where you want to go. So some people expect that coaching is just therapy under a different name, and that's not true at all. Therapists are properly licensed. They've gone through years of schooling, whereas coaching most of us coaches have certain different certifications and there's not a board that oversees all of us.
00;02;44;20 - 00;03;10;26
Lisa
So to be honest, the coaching world can be a little bit like the wild, Wild West. So you want to make sure that before you hire any coach or any therapist that you really vet them. Like who are they? Do they walk their talk? Are they congruent? So this is a massive thing for me. I am always working with a coach because I am a coach and I don't believe that I can lead.
00;03;10;26 - 00;03;35;02
Lisa
I can only lead people to the depth that I have led myself and allowed myself to be led. And I really believe that with coaches and therapists as well. If you're working with a therapist who is and actively working with her own therapist, I would personally, for me, I would question that. Same thing with coaching. And what you really want to look for is that who they say they are is the same as how they're showing up.
00;03;35;05 - 00;03;57;03
Lisa
So meaning that, for instance, what you see on social media, if you're following them on social media, is that who they really are? They really letting you see who they really are? So that's where I would start with coaching and therapy. They are actually two different things, and I'm going to get into how different they are from each other.
00;03;57;06 - 00;04;28;19
Lisa
So what coaching isn't is I'm not here to fix you. I'm not here to coddle you. We're not going to like rehash the past and spend a lot of time there. And most people go into therapy because they are looking to be fixed. A lot of times in therapy, you can spend a lot of time in your feelings and really being in those past experiences that need to maybe be cleared or healed or worked on.
00;04;28;22 - 00;04;58;15
Lisa
And listen, I have had both coaches and therapists, so I have had experiences with both. I still do have an active therapist on my team, and I also have a coach. So each person plays a little bit of a different role, and my expectations of what I get from each of them are also slightly different. So with therapy, predominantly therapy is really focused on the past things that happened to you with, you know, we always hear this joke, right?
00;04;58;15 - 00;05;10;08
Lisa
Your parents, your family, you know, little T and often in therapy, that's where Big T trauma is addressed.
00;05;10;11 - 00;05;38;24
Lisa
You know, I was watching a coaching call with somebody who was deep, deep, deep in codependency. And I remember that in myself from over a decade ago. And no coach could have helped me with that because I really needed to be with a skilled therapist who understood the depths of codependency. And this is why I say even people who, when they're ready to work with me, they have to have done a certain amount of work on themselves in order to be ready to step into a room to do coaching with me.
00;05;38;27 - 00;05;59;23
Lisa
So coaching really is focused on the future. Where are you today? Where is it you want to go and what needs to shift in order to get you there? Now, sometimes it does require us looking at some of the things that happened in the past that created these stories and beliefs that are keeping you stuck for lack of a better term.
00;05;59;25 - 00;06;19;13
Lisa
But coaching is always forward facing. How do we get you from point A to point B? So if you're feeling this way and you want to feel this way, how do we get you there? We're not trying to unravel your history with your parents or any of that stuff that at least that's not the coaching that I do.
00;06;19;15 - 00;06;49;18
Lisa
Coaching also really focuses on this deep identity shift. So about who you are being at your core, What is your identity? Where is therapy is often focused on different insights about how things have impacted you. Now, in my coaching, I focus a lot on insights as well. But again, it's always going to be future facing and focused on How can that insight provide that identity shift.
00;06;49;25 - 00;07;16;13
Lisa
So therapy, you're going to get more emotional healing work. And again, I do do some of that in my coaching, but I'm really looking at emotional leadership. So how you can lead yourself better by learning how to be with understand, navigate and master your emotions. First of all, learning how to feel your feelings and then how you can step into leading yourself.
00;07;16;13 - 00;07;46;13
Lisa
So your emotions aren't mean, aren't leading you. So we also, in coaching focus really on accountability, identity and taking action. So that is also a really big distinction in therapy. I'm very rarely left with like, okay, here are some things that I want you to go and implement out in your life. I come in with my problem, we talk about it, and then I get some insight and then I leave.
00;07;46;14 - 00;08;07;22
Lisa
Whereas with coaching, we're really looking at how we can create that awareness and then moving into this place of accepting this part of you that maybe you didn't, didn't know or weren't aware of, and then getting you into actions that we can create a different outcome and then embodying that new way of being and repeat and repeat and repeat.
00;08;07;24 - 00;08;30;07
Lisa
So hopefully that gives you a little bit of an overview. Now, coaching IT therapy has started to get blurred over the years because many therapists are now actually learning how to do coaching as well. And many coaches have started to bring in therapeutic models. But please understand, right? Like a therapist is a licensed person, they are governed under a board.
00;08;30;09 - 00;08;54;17
Lisa
They have their able to speak to different, they have a different scope of practice than I do. So I'm not going to work with somebody where I'm working on these deep traumas that they've had sexual abuse, blah, blah, blah. And it doesn't mean that my clients haven't had those in their past. But that is not the primary focus of where my coaching goes.
00;08;54;17 - 00;09;16;01
Lisa
Again, my coaching is focused on where are you today, what do you want to get to and what needs to shift within you to have that happen. We may have to talk about how that impacted your life, but we're not going to dive into it and dissect it. That's going to be something that you're going to do in a therapeutic setting with a proper therapist.
00;09;16;03 - 00;09;41;02
Lisa
So my coaching, how it's different. So a big part of my coaching and I've been sharing this more and more is that I coach to your contacts. So I listen to the words that are coming out of your mouth, but I actually can hear and see the patterns underneath those words. So I'm not looking at your circumstances because I actually know that the problem that you think you have is more often than not, not the problem you actually have.
00;09;41;08 - 00;10;05;00
Lisa
And I don't want to keep you stuck in the problem. So if I coach to the the content that you're giving me, I'm actually keeping you trapped in that pattern. And sometimes that can happen in therapy. You just keep talking about the same problem over and over and over again and feeling like you're not making any headway. Because the more you talk about a problem, the more you keep your focus and attention on that problem, the bigger the problem gets.
00;10;05;02 - 00;10;30;06
Lisa
My job as a coach is to move you past that and into action so that you can create different outcomes for yourself. So I also help collapse time because when you start to shift your identity, things change quickly. So I don't want you in overthinking and overanalyzing of every single little detail we're looking at. Like who do you need to become?
00;10;30;09 - 00;10;58;15
Lisa
What do you need to grow into? What needs to shift within you? So for example, when I think about, say, my relationship with money. So first of all, I talk about money as being a relationship. So if money were a person, what kind of relationship would you be having with that person? So when I was trying to shift my relationship with money, I had to start looking at like, what kind of identity do I need to step into to be an empowered person with money?
00;10;58;16 - 00;11;19;11
Lisa
How would an empowered, wealthy person be with their money? What kind of relation ship would they have that would be different from how I'm showing up? For example, they would probably pay their bills on time. They would probably have a sightline on their money. They would probably treat their money with a lot more reverence than I was treating my money at the time.
00;11;19;11 - 00;11;40;16
Lisa
So this is what I mean around shifting my identity. Now I'm a person who doesn't carry any debt because I identify with being a person of no debt. Now, I'm not saying that debt is bad. It's not good either. It's it's pretty much neutral. But for me personally, I want to be the person that doesn't carry any debt.
00;11;40;16 - 00;12;05;05
Lisa
That's part of my identity now, just like my identity is one of being an athlete. So if I am working with a client who's struggled with her relationship with her body her whole life, she doesn't identify as somebody who is an athlete. So what kind of shift would need to happen in order to step into a person who identifies as being an athlete or a very healthy person?
00;12;05;12 - 00;12;40;00
Lisa
And can you see how once you step into that new identity, time would collapse because things would suddenly become so much easier? So in coaching as well, I don't just hear you, so I'm always listening. I'm here to hold very safe and seek. I call it Sacred space, because for many of the men and women that I work with, often, they've never allowed themselves to be open and vulnerable and to feel safe to share the things that are deeply rooted in their heart, things that they've never shared with anybody.
00;12;40;07 - 00;13;08;04
Lisa
Because quite often the people that I work with are the ones who are so responsible for everybody else. They're the leaders and they're they don't get to be vulnerable because so many people are counting on them to lead the way. So in my space, they're not just heard, but they're also held. They're held in a very safe space where they can be open and vulnerable, but they're also very much challenged and championed.
00;13;08;06 - 00;13;33;02
Lisa
So I am going to push back. I'm going to be that person that says the thing to you that might be incredibly disruptive, and I'm always going to do it from a place of care and concern, but it doesn't help me to leave you sitting in your emotions, not taking any forward momentum. My job is to disrupt your beliefs, disrupt your current narrative so that you can create something new.
00;13;33;09 - 00;14;01;23
Lisa
And often in therapy, as I've said, there can be a focus on talking about the problem over and over and over again and the therapist not necessarily challenging the person as hard as they could if they were using powerful coaching questions. So again, this is just my experience. And again, I'm not knocking therapists. I love my therapist. I legit could not have navigated through the last couple of years without my therapist.
00;14;01;23 - 00;14;24;24
Lisa
And she is she is awesome. She is so, so good. And I am not the easiest person to coach because I am such a world class coach. So obviously I'm not the easiest person to coach because you know, you have to really be able to hold space for me, otherwise I'm not going to listen. That's what happens when you when you arrive at a certain level of mastery.
00;14;24;24 - 00;14;45;15
Lisa
You have to be working with people that can meet you where you're at and help write you up. So my therapist very, very good. So I don't want to throw therapists under the bus. I'm just trying to give you an overview picture of how therapy and coaching can be radically different so that you can make a decision that's best for you based on what's going on in your life.
00;14;45;18 - 00;15;02;05
Lisa
And for me, in 2023, what had happened did create a significant amount of trauma. We'll call it little T trauma. It felt like big T trauma at the time, and I needed a therapist who was very skilled in an area that I was not skilled in, and I was not interested in having a coach. I wanted a therapist.
00;15;02;05 - 00;15;27;28
Lisa
I wanted somebody who could just sit and listen to me talk. And I didn't want a lot of big questions asked to me at first. I just needed to be in what had happened because I was trying to understand so coaches aren't going to let you just sit there and wallow. And not that I was fully wallowing, but I did just need to like, be in the fields of it and allow my body to process what had happened.
00;15;28;00 - 00;16;00;05
Lisa
So coaching is also very much about if you haven't picked up on this yet, it's about expansion. So again, I'm not here to fix anything, although people often come to me and there are things that they don't like that they want changed in their lives. But what I said to one of my long term clients is, you know, the thing about coaching, the longer you're in coaching, the more you realize that you have a coach because it helps you expand into even more coaches aren't something you necessarily need, but there's something that you want.
00;16;00;05 - 00;16;22;02
Lisa
There's something that I want because I love what it brings to my life. I love that it opens up more for me. So to me that is what coaching is about. It's all about expansion. So when my clients come to me, they aren't typically in crisis. They've created amazing lives for themselves, but they're not feeling good about who they are from the inside.
00;16;22;02 - 00;16;42;26
Lisa
They're struggling again with that congruence with life, looking a certain way on the outside, but them not feeling the certain way on the inside and also the pursuit of more and more and more and more and more can become this toxic thing because they never truly feel fulfilled. And I want my clients to be accomplishing whatever they want in the world.
00;16;42;26 - 00;17;11;04
Lisa
I mean, I'm a highly ambitious person myself, but I want them to be able to do it from a place of feeling fulfilled and really proud of themselves for where they are today, knowing that that they can create more, but no longer having to work from lack or scarcity or feeling like they're just not good enough. So signs that you might need therapy over coaching when therapy is right and when coaching is right, or maybe coaching is what you're craving.
00;17;11;06 - 00;17;37;06
Lisa
So if you are going through things like clinical depression, trauma, massive amounts of anxiety, that is that is a sign that you probably need some good solid therapeutics support. And like I said, there are so many phenomenal therapists out there. Get referrals, ask around and find the person that is right for you. And just like coaches, you know, you can have a call with therapists just to see like, are you vibing?
00;17;37;09 - 00;17;56;26
Lisa
It is really important for me whether I'm hiring a coach or a therapist, that we are in alignment. So there are certain things that have to be there for me in order to feel like I can be in this container and be open and be completely myself. So signs that you might be ready for coaching, you feel stuck.
00;17;56;26 - 00;18;21;17
Lisa
Despite having it all, you seem to keep coming back and repeating the same pattern over and over and over again. And you're telling yourself you should know better. You've done a lot of self development work. Maybe you've had years in therapy, but you're just not getting the momentum that you want. Perhaps you're craving clarity. What is your next steps?
00;18;21;17 - 00;18;41;15
Lisa
I've got somebody that I'm speaking with who is about to retire and they're like, God, what is next for me? That's a great time to also be doing coaching because we can ask coaches can ask the bigger questions to help create some of that clarity for you and to make sure that whatever you're stepping into is going to be aligned for you.
00;18;41;17 - 00;19;10;21
Lisa
So even around that, I've worked with clients before who are really there were things in their relationship that weren't a good fit for where they were in their business. I've worked with clients who have wanted to leave jobs to move into something new. I've worked with clients who are CEOs and executives who are trying to make big, bold decisions about what's next for them or how they need to steer their ship or their team.
00;19;10;23 - 00;19;44;02
Lisa
So there are so many opportunities for coaching around. Again, what is the future that you want to create for yourself? And a big thing to decide is it's not about what you're doing anymore, but you're recognizing like, Wow, what if this is a me problem and it's looking at how you might want to start shifting your identity to have what you want versus talking about the current reality that you're stuck in.
00;19;44;04 - 00;20;18;01
Lisa
So if you're done being, I will call it a victim of your circumstance. If you're really ready to step into personal responsibility for the life you want to create for yourself. And that's that's a there's a big difference there. It's a great time to look at a coach. So if something in today's episodes hit home, if you have been stuck in this loop of constant doing, achieving, performing, but still feeling like something's missing, maybe you're repeating patterns all the time.
00;20;18;03 - 00;20;39;07
Lisa
You don't know how to really rest without feeling guilty. You struggle to prioritize yourself. Maybe your wellbeing is not where you want it to be. Everything else, you're ticking the boxes, but you're like, Man, I'm just not taking great care of myself. What is causing that? Why can't I get a handle on this? That is something that we can address in coaching.
00;20;39;09 - 00;21;06;08
Lisa
So I'd like to invite you to a different type of conversation. So below the show notes here, I'm going to put a link for you to reach out and jump on my calendar. If you are interested in exploring coaching. I've got some openings in the summer and into the fall. We are also have registration open for reclamation, which is my hybrid group 1 to 1 coaching container.
00;21;06;15 - 00;21;25;08
Lisa
So that is also a place you may want to explore if you want to start dipping your toe into what does ongoing coaching look like. So there are lots of options for you to get a taste of what this work is like, including individual. I do single sessions with people if they just want. Oh, what is this coaching stuff about?
00;21;25;08 - 00;22;02;21
Lisa
Lisa Tell me more about it. Bring your biggest problem and we will work together on that call to really dive deep into what's going on for you and get some monumental shifts. So hopefully this episode was helpful for you. It was very helpful to the lady that I was sharing it with while I was on the Camino. So if it resonates, I would love for you to share it with your friends and of course continue to tune in to the Full Frontal Living podcast and I will continue to bring you nuggets of wisdom to help you expand into the life that you truly want for yourself so that you can feel the way you want
00;22;02;21 - 00;22;26;17
Lisa
to feel. So until the next episode, take good care of you. Hey. Hey. Before you go, I'd like to ask you something. How much longer are you willing to put yourself last to keep pushing through, hoping things will magically change while feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and disconnected from the life you truly want? Tell me if this sounds like you from the outside.
00;22;26;17 - 00;22;49;19
Lisa
Most people think you have it all figured out. But the truth is that on most days you feel like you're barely holding it together. Your life is full of responsibilities and there's a high demand on your time and energy. You know you can't drop the ball yet. You're terrified it's going to happen. And worst of all, you're already taking the hit because you often end up at the bottom of your to do list.
00;22;49;22 - 00;23;22;29
Lisa
You've achieved so much, yet deep down, what you want most is more ease, more fulfillment, more joy, more you. And that is exactly what reclamation is all about. This isn't just another program. It's your opportunity to finally break free from the patterns that are keeping you stuck and step into a life that feels aligned, intentional and fulfilling. It's a safe space to have conversations that matter with women who get you and share your complicated relationship with vulnerability.
00;23;23;02 - 00;23;49;18
Lisa
Imagine having the support, the tools and the accountability to create real, lasting change where you're no longer just surviving, but thriving. So if you're done with feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and constantly running on empty, it's time to take that first step. Head to Lisa Carpenter Dot k forward slash reclamation and say yes to yourself, yes to the life you know you're meant for.
00;23;49;18 - 00;23;56;02
Lisa
Because if nothing changes, nothing changes. I'll see you on the inside.
